The Idea

An idea was shared
so pure and so true
Preaching with wisdom
of the life no one knew

A life of equality
Of freedom and joy
Where no one could trick you
With some sinister ploy

So accepted it was
By all those involved
Not knowing that soon
It would all be dissolved

Not knowing their ideals
So pure and so true
Would be mangled so strangely
letting havoc ensue

Seeking a leader
To guide them along
They fallowed, oblivious
To it all going wrong

And when they saw through
Disguise after disguise
Each truth was shielded
By still more lies

So though they worked harder
And ate so much less
They still didn’t see
That they’re lives were a mess

That the thoughts from before
Were far from today’s
And their lives had turned sour
In so many ways

No, they just kept working
Day after day
Believing the lies
That kept coming their way

Life Lessons

Throughout my life my mother always requested that I step back and find compassion and understanding for my peers, even if I didn't like them. So when I came home from my first days of first grade, it was with this message in mind that she advised me. I'd complained to her about the oddities of one of my fellow first graders, explaining her agitating behaviors, and it was then that my mother spoke up, declaring that "maybe she just needs a friend." At the time, her insight only confused me.

However, once the message sank in, and ever sense, I've had a nagging voice in the back of my mind reminding me to see from a different perspective, to think of the thoughts and emotions of others. I'd suddenly realized that other people had thoughts and emotions in the same way that i had thoughts and emotions. For a first grader, the epiphany was epic. I'm sure this lesson is learned by everyone as they grow up, but for some reason this lesson haunts me stronger than most. It's easy for me to over complicate a situation by analyzing the impact of my actions too closely, and I often have to take a second and chill out. So, both a blessing and a curse, I've learned to see multiple sides to situations and conflicts, no matter how strong my opinions.

Friend Characterization

For years me and my friend Emmalene have confronted the vast differences between us. As little kids I was the one who'd yell after the person who stole our wall ball, demanding that they return it, me who would tell her when I and why I was mad. If someone stole our wall ball she'd watch in disbelief before going to get another, when angry or frustrated she wouldn't say a thing. when going out to play I payed no attention to the affect of dirt and grime on my clothes, where as she and been taught otherwise. Later, when we started cooking and baking tasty treats, she came with a cookbook and I came with the kitchen cabinet. She'd go step by step, adding 1/4 cup of butter, then one cup of sugar, while I threw in pinches and dashes of anything I could get my hands on. She'd give me one of her "you are so very crazy" looks and her disapproval and disappointment were very clear. She grew up with sisters, correcting and critiquing her every move, where as I grew up with an older brother whom I both worshiped and despised. A brother who only taught me the ways of video games and capture the flag, and whose worst criticism was that I couldn't make the right sound for a gunshot.

Emmalene and I grew up as complete opposites, an aspect of our relationship that seemed to surface at every encounter. when we were younger it was my opinionated and outspoken nature that contrasted so well with her quite, tentative self. Her family was conventional, straight laced, where as mine was wild and accepting. She was complacent and receptive to other peoples opinions, where as I was oppositional and suborn. Even now, despite all of the ways we have changed, Emmalene and I still have several differences ranging from our appearance to the opinions and values we both hold strong.

Early Memory

In the school year of 2000-2001 I remember the day Olympia was hit by a tremendous earthquake. I was in kindergarten at the time, sitting at a little table, eating a snack with my favorite red teddy bear. We'd gone through the drill before; hide under a table, stay away from windows, but it didn't quite prepare me for the rush of fear i felt when i realized what was actually happening. My little heart started pounding profusely as I got up from the table and promptly ran across the room to hide under another. Even at the time I recall thinking this was silly.

We sat there waiting patiently for the directions from our teacher, our eyes peering wildly at each other from beneath the desks. This was probably the most exciting thing any of us had experienced, and it was both thrilling and dangerous, taking our breath away. Finally an announcement was sounded instructing our teachers to escort us from the building. A sea of hands and feet scrambled out from under the desks and we were then ushered into a sloppy line in front of the door. We were told to leave everything, that they'd bring it to us later, but i spotted my teddy across the room and new what i had to do. Slipping out of line, I weaved between my classmates as fast as my little feet would take me, seizing my teddy from the table and scurrying back just as we made our way out the door, my teddy safe and sound.

Invisable Man: Point of View

Throughout Invisible Man a series of events take place, each providing new insight into the racially divided world that Ralph Ellison's main character (he's unnamed) lives in. At the beginning of the book the main character is quite naive. The way the southern white people believe black people should act is the way he believes he should act as well. However, as the novel unfolds the main character undergoes a variety of experiences that shape his way of thinking, and by being privy to his thoughts and feelings the reader also gets to tag along on his journey.

Reading the thoughts and feelings that Ellison's character transitions through while discovering the complexities of his society helps the reader to experience the change in his thinking first hand. The reader, entering the story seeing through a distortion of the truth, slowly starts to see a clearer image as the main character himself starts to see a his world with more clarity.

Outside Reading

The book I'm reading for outside reading, Invisible Man, is a little confusing. The author, Ralph Ellison, uses tones of descriptions that can go on for pages, and it's easy to get lost in the mess of adjectives and metaphors. I am interested in the more philosophical aspects of the book though regarding racism and the thinking behind it.

Imagery is a key part in this novel so far, pages of descriptions, but I'm paying close attention to all literary devices to see if the trend changes. Ellison is probably using imagery to create the setting of the novel, give the reader a picture to work off of when creating the story in their head. He also might be using so much description to really draw the reader in (even though it's doing opposite for me).

The tone of invisible man is hard to describe. It has a feeling of directness that could possibly be described as informative, but it has a sort of magical feel, or rather a funny sort of madness. Many of the passages of deep and lengthy descriptions seem to hover on the edges of being logical and sane, and they often have a reckless feeling to them as well.

Reading

I don't have much patience for books i don't find interesting. I used to scan the back cover before sliding book after book back onto the shelf. When i come to a part of a book that's not very interesting, or stops making sense, my mind starts to drift off to other things while my eyes continue to scan the words, taking in nothing. I have to go back time after time and focus intently on the passage my mind keeps skipping, trying to imagine the scene,what the characters are doing, what they look like, how they feel. So, regrettably, the boring and confusing parts of a book might take me hours while the good ones are gone in seconds.

My ideal reading environment varies from book to book. Some books are easy and quick paced, making them easier to read in hectic places. Others however, like those that are written in fancy formal diction, require much more concentration, and thus i need quieter and less distracting places to read them in. If where i am is not a good atmosphere for reading then i either put my book down and do something else, or i leave, finding a better place to read.

When i read i have to completely understand everything or the book or passage I'm reading will come off as a total blur in my mind. When i don't understand a sentence, i reread it, i make sure i know who's speaking, what their feeling, and what they mean by their remark, in order to completely visualize the scene. If i can't create the scene with the right undertones, then I'm lost.

For me to read fiction is like dropping into someone elses little world, experiencing the things they experience, seeing the things they see. So i guess i read fiction because i like the trip, i like to have the little adventure into someone elses life and all the things involved in it. In fiction, while you follow a character through their life, you get to observe the obstacle in their lives and the diccisions they make to avoid them. Having examples of numerous situation and how they can be hadled enhances my understanding of things i might not have ever experienced.